Common Misconceptions About OCD (Part 3)
Trying to Control Your Thoughts
Many individuals with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) feel a strong need to control their environment—and this often extends inward, leading them to attempt controlling their own thoughts. This desire for mental mastery can backfire, trapping them in a cycle of obsessive thinking. The more they try to manage or eliminate certain thoughts, the more powerful and frequent those thoughts become.
The Trap of Thought Identification
Obsessive thinking typically follows two patterns. The first is identification with intrusive thoughts. For example, someone might get stuck on a seemingly philosophical question like, "Why does one plus one equal two?" They feel compelled to find a definitive answer. Without resolution, anxiety builds, fueling further rumination. The mind spirals into over-analysis, creating more questions than answers. But here's the truth: not all questions have satisfying conclusions. In fact, chasing certainty only deepens the distress. The healthier path isn't solving the thought—it's accepting its presence without engaging.
Resisting Unwanted Thoughts
The second pattern involves resisting or suppressing disturbing thoughts. Imagine a sudden mental image of jumping from a building. The person panics, thinking, "What if I actually do it?" They then try to push the thought away, believing that having such an idea means they're dangerous. But suppression doesn't work—like trying not to think of a pink elephant, the very act makes it appear more vividly. The harder you fight a thought, the stronger it becomes.
The most effective approach? Adopt a mindset of allowing without reacting. Let thoughts come and go like clouds passing through the sky. Don't embrace them, don't reject them—just notice them and let them pass. This non-judgmental awareness reduces their emotional charge over time.
Attempting to Control Emotions
Another common struggle among people with OCD is the desire to control emotions. Many believe they should only experience positive feelings—joy, excitement, contentment—and view negative emotions like anxiety, sadness, fear, or despair as enemies to be eliminated. When these uncomfortable emotions arise, they resist them, suppress them, or seek distractions to escape.
Why Emotional Suppression Fails
Emotions are natural, temporary states—they rise and fall like waves. No emotion lasts forever. Anxiety peaks and then fades. Sadness comes and eventually passes. But when we resist these feelings, we give them more power. Trying to force happiness during grief or suppress fear during uncertainty only prolongs discomfort. It's like tightening your grip on a balloon; the pressure builds until it bursts.
Rather than fighting emotions, a more adaptive strategy is emotional acceptance. Acknowledge what you're feeling without judgment. Say to yourself, "I'm feeling anxious right now, and that's okay." This doesn't mean liking the emotion—it means making space for it. With time and practice, this attitude reduces the intensity and frequency of emotional spikes.
Struggling to Control Physical Symptoms
Some individuals with OCD focus intensely on bodily sensations—such as chest tightness, rapid heartbeat, tingling hands, dizziness, or shortness of breath. These physical responses are often misinterpreted as signs of serious illness or danger. In response, they may engage in safety behaviors—checking pulse, avoiding exercise, seeking reassurance—to make the sensations go away.
The Body's Natural Balance
These symptoms are typically caused by heightened activity in the sympathetic nervous system—the body's "fight-or-flight" response. While uncomfortable, they are not harmful. Eventually, the parasympathetic nervous system kicks in to restore balance. However, when we hyper-focus on these sensations and try to eliminate them, we increase arousal and prolong discomfort.
Instead of resisting, the key is to coexist with physical discomfort. Learn to carry these sensations while continuing daily activities. Go to work. Have dinner with friends. Take a walk. By doing so, you send a message to your brain: "This sensation is not dangerous." Over time, the body learns to regulate itself naturally, and the fear around symptoms diminishes.
In summary, much of the suffering in OCD stems not from the thoughts, emotions, or sensations themselves—but from the struggle to control them. Freedom begins when we shift from resistance to acceptance, from avoidance to willingness. Healing isn't about eliminating discomfort; it's about changing our relationship with it.